and then there was one...

I had not thought that Boston Writer Girl was that attached to me. In retrospect, I should have known better when she mentioned I had been assigned my own ringer tone on her cell.

I got together with Boston Writer last week and knew I was going to say it. I had been ambivalent... she had been ambivalent... and things with Academy Girl had escalated so nicely that continuing to see them both was going beyond studly on my part and entering sleezebag territory.

We'd enjoy our dinner, and our beers and I would come clean with the truth: That I'd been seeing someone else at the same time and it was getting more serious. And though I was determined to not let "let's be friends" pass my lips, it would be implied. We'd kiss, continue to email and eventually combine our social circles.

As you can probably guess, this did not go as planned. In fact, it actually went quite terribly.

A few minutes into eating, she began to ask me about what we were doing. Where was this going? What was I thinking? I took the segue, smiled shyly and started in with what I had to say...

"I can't believe this," she said. "You're making a mistake. I was trying to take it slow, for you." she said. "This other girl put out and now you're attached?"

I told her it was not like that. I just didn't want to be that guy, sleeping with one girl while I strung another along. It wasn't fair to anyone.

"That's why you're the perfect guy," she said.

I was flattered. I was paralyzed. Everything I said sounded stupid, so I finally just stopped talking.

And now our whole dinner is just a complete blurr of miserable moments. No matter what I said, Boston Writer just threw compliments at me. She said she continued to go out with other men only to check her watch 30 minutes into the dates. Even dates that she enjoyed, she had said to herself, they're not "Harold." She had made a list of the ten perfect things about me, had put it in a card and was going to give it to me the next time.

I never expected a breakup scene, but that's exactly what it was. She finally ran out of the restaurant when she thought she was about to start crying...


Since then, she and I have talked on the phone, and she now understands that I clearly think I have something with this other woman that I don't have with her. She's willing to try to be pals and we even got together for ice cream.

Hopefully, we really will be friends and I'm not just feeling better about myself now that she'll speak to me. Time will tell...